Depression and Hair Loss: You’re not Alone
September 8, 2008 by Spencer Kobren
When I first realized I was losing my hair, more than 20 years ago, I was absolutely mortified, however, I think my reaction to the initial onset of hair loss was fairly typical.
First, I went through the denial phase. I tried to convince myself that This can’t really be happening to me. I mean I was only 21. It must be the water or something right?
Next came the questioning phase. I asked select friends and family questions like “Does my hair look different to you? Do I look like I’m going bald?”
This is never a good idea. The truth is you’ll get different reactions depending on who you ask. Some family members will attempt to spare your feelings by saying things like, “Your hair looks great… What are you talking about? You have a ton of hair!”
There’s always one family member, usually a woman, who says “You’re crazy. You’re not the type to go bald.” To this day I’ve never figured out what that means.
Male siblings, on the other hand, can be a little more direct. They’ll tell it like it is and of course throw in a couple of bald jokes.
This is what happened in my case, and this is when my panic phase began. It was true. I was going bald, and at the time I thought my life was over. The date was December 31 1987, New Year’s Eve, the day that has forever changed my life.
I’m not sure if I was prone to depression. I don’t remember ever being quite so down until this time in my life, but I will tell you this: it was very real and it was really bad!
The simple act of showering was torturous for me. To see my hair in my hands and going down the drain with each passing day felt like a slow death.
I was having trouble concentrating at work. I couldn’t enjoy going out with my friends because I was becoming increasing self-conscious about my appearance, and I hated to look at myself in the mirror or in storefront reflections. I became obsessed with my hair loss, and as the weeks passed, my self-esteem was diminishing. I went from a relatively together kid to an emotional mess in less than a year. I was quickly slipping into a really dark place.
Society tells us that guys shouldn’t care about losing their hair. As men, we were raised to believe that any guy who would be so hyper-concerned about something as frivolous as hair loss is a pathetic excuse for a man. Buck up! Get it together! It’s only hair. Deal with it. It’s part of life.
Well, that’s easy to say if it’s not happening to you. But the truth is, while society doesn’t like to admit it, we are all judged by our appearance, especially when we’re young.
If you’re a young guy reading this article, it’s important that you know you are not alone.
Losing your hair can drastically change the way you perceive yourself and it can change the way others react to you in all aspects of life. I’m not going to sugarcoat it.
Because of this fact, it’s reasonable to have feelings of confusion and despair. This is nothing to be ashamed of. There will be women who reject you because of your hair loss. There will be situations in which people will openly make less than polite comments and observations about your receding hairline. These are just the facts.
At first it will be difficult to deal with, but I am here, as someone who was once a severely depressed hair loss sufferer, to tell you that there is life after hair loss.
More than twenty years have passed since that fateful day back in 1987, and there are still days when I deal with feelings of sadness. The fact is, I’ve been extremely fortunate to save as much hair as I have, but the day still may come when I have to let go and just deal with the further progression of my hair loss.
I’m going to save the discussion about what I did and all of the money I spent in an attempt to free myself from the nightmare of hair loss for another article.
I just wanted to let you guys know that I do what I do because I’m just like you. I’m a guy who was hit hard by the onset of his hair loss.
There was a time that I thought I was all alone with my feelings. I believed I was weak and vain because this is what society had drummed into my head. However, instead of letting hair loss overwhelm my life, I chose to take charge of my emotions and my future by turning my obsession into something positive. My profession is built on the hope that shedding a bright light on the harsh reality of hair loss will change the way we experience hair loss and the way society treats hair loss sufferers. I want you to know that while it might not be easy, it does get better.
Be Strong!
Spencer Kobren
Host of The Bald Truth Radio Show
Founder, American Hair Loss Association
Founder and Director of Consumer/Patient Affairs, International Alliance of Hair Restoration Surgeons (IAHRS.ORG)
I felt weak and vain too for being so concerned about my hair loss early on. People have a way of making you feel that way. ..like it’s just a frivolous concern or something. Isn’t that crazy? This in NOT a frivolous concern. Hair loss seeps into and colors almost every aspect of our lives.
I’m with you on feeling all alone about my feelings. It’s not easy to confide in your family or friends about it. Especially when you are 16 like I was.
Hi Spencer,
This is the 2nd part of my hairloss story. I just read your article about depression and hair loss. It was right on! Going bald goes a lot deeper than people think. When we lose our hair, we lose a part of ourselves. We lose a part of our identity. Hair isn’t just dead protein on our heads. Hair frames our face. Take a look at a picture of a guy before and after a hairpiece. It’s night and day. With the hairpiece on, you can’t even recognize him. Baldness is a medical condition. Furthermore, it’s a biological error. It’s a genetic defect. Our hair is on our heads to protect our scalp from the elements, as well as frame our face and give us our look. I bought a cheap dirty blond wig online and put it on. I couldn’t believe how different I looked. I could finally recognize myself. Identity has been a major issue for me. I don’t recognize myself when I’m bald. I feel as though I’m on chemo. I’ve been a norwood six for ten years, and I still don’t know what I’m looking at in the mirror.
It’s amazing that it’s 2008, and they can’t cure androgenetic alopecia. They can do rocket propulsion,astrophysics, as well as decode the human genome but they can’t cure baldness. What the hell is that?
I don’t believe I will ever be the Geoff I was when I had hair. I had my wavy, thick hair on top. I used hair gel, and the girls loved my hair as well as me. I had the boy band look. They were all over me. I remember being 16 years old and coming home on the train from Boston. I met two girls(about my age)on the train, and they gave me their phone numbers. One was a brunette, and one was blonde.They literally called me up on the phone one day and told me that I was HOT! Of course, at that time, I had BARELY begun to recede on my temples. Those days are nothing but a daydream now. A constant daydream. Some sort of fantasy I never got to experience. One of the girl’s names was Erin. I developed a phone relationship with her. I liked her. One day she made a derogatory remark about a bald guy who lived next to her. Ouch! That hurt. Although you couldn’t really notice my receding hairline, it was detectable with some effort. I was freaking 16!!!! I never got a chance to be a kid. That’s all I ever wanted. I have many stories like that. They all end with my being trapped in my body.
I just don’t have the confidence I once had. I excelled at every sport I did, got academic awards, and felt as though I could conquer the world. I have suffered from major depression, severe OCD, and anxiety. I believe most of this is related to my hairloss. Only those who have been affected by hairloss will understand me. When my mother was dying from cancer when I was 17, I never saw her cry until she began losing her hair. If that doesn’t make people understand the gravity of hairloss, I don’t know what will.
-Geoff
My life is not so great because of going bald. I lost my hair rapidly, it took about 5 years from start to completely bald on top. I am now 29 years old and think I could have had a better job if I didn’t go through this. I was married young when I had hair, but I still think that my wife thinks she got got gypped. She has been hinting to me to have a hair transplant. Every time sees see a Bosledy commercial on TV she makes comments like that guy look very good. It makes me feel even worse about myself to think that my own wife is disappointed and feels stuck with me.
Hey do you podcast the radio show?
Hey Spencer:
You’re a great voice of truth, reason, and reality in this forsaken hairloss industry — especially in the surgical hair transplant industry. It absolutely baffles me that there are big clinics out there that are so ready and willing to cut into the heads of emotionally-prone, vulnerable men. Blood and tissue. And for what? Money? And these poor men probably think that in 3 months, they’re going to be just like the “after” pictures that probably sold them. I can speak from experience — it takes time and it takes research and education. In my opinion, stick with the IAHRS and only with it. My IAHRS doctor gave me the education I needed to make an intelligent decision, and that I did. And I lucky to say I am very happy.
Tee Jay
This is a very good article! I live with depression because of my hair loss and I’ve been living with it for 11 years. I’m currently in therapy and have taken several anti depressants which have helped but I still have to deal with looking at least 10 years older than I really am. I have good days and bad days like everyone else but I have been feeling better these last couple of years. I have a very understanding girlfriend who really helps me so I guess I’ve very lucky.
I’m glad that there is a place like this for guys like us. I’ve been listening to your show for about 7 months and I love it! You have helped me change my attitude about a lot of things especially how I deal with my baldness. I actually began using dermmatch after I heard you say that you use it and it definitely helps me feel better during my day.
Thanks again!
-Lee
Hey Geoff,
Just wanted to let you know that of all my friends the one who does the best with the ladies is a complete norwood—he’s got a head like a countertop. But when it happened to him he got himself a decent tan and got in shape and kept his hair very short and now he’s got more chicks than anyone I know. Hair loss does make it more challenging to get women–because it saps your self confidence –but trust me you can adapt and overcome it. You’ll still be able to get girls.
Hey Robert,
Due to contractual issues we can not podcast the entire broadcast at this time. Things might change in the future, but in the meantime we’ll try to update the featured segments as often as possible.
Thanks for all of the comments guys!
Spencer
All of you guys have plenty of positive things ahead of you! Including you…. Spencer. Hair loss is something you deal with. While I prefer not to be bald and will do anything (within reason) to stop it……..I would accept being bald because I’d have no other choice.
The best way to DEAL with a fear is to face it! Otherwise, it will become repressed and cause depression/anxiety and all the stuff you don’t need in your life. Dudes, kids have cancer at age 6, a mother dies when her baby is 6 months old, a nun gets killed delivering food to the homeless…….no matter what…… you have to keep moving forward and keep thriving in life. Accept things that you can not change or fight a LOSING battle.
Love you all!!!!
Thanks for the update Spencer! I really wish you could somehow put the entire show on your website. I really enjoy listening and sometimes I would like to rewind it if I could.
Why don’t you just record the show off of Stickam? I’m sure it’s fine as long as you don’t plan to rebroadcast it.
-Lee
I started losing my hair at 14 years old and it sucks!
Hair loss completely destroyed my self-steem and my will to keep liviing.
People say “don’t care… it’s just hair” but it’s not on their heads.
Knowing that you’ll never be able to enjoy your hair again and will be slave to the grandfather look even when you’re young is a freaking curse!!!
I hate hair loss! Please someone cure this disease! I want my life back and I’m willing to pay any amount of money for a real cure!
Hey man,
So many of our listeners are in your exact position. You’re not alone. Tune into the show it can really help.
I am 15 and the past 6 months/year iv been noticing in class that my hair is falling out onto my jotter. I am naturally blond but my hair has been dyed brown but the roots are blond, when it falls out its only brown hair. I get really down and depressed about it sometimes and i have asked my mother and my aunt if they have noticed any changes but they both said no. Are they just saying what i want to hear because i am sure that i can see my hairlin receding.
I started losing my hair at age 19. It has gone from being absolutely thick to being very thin, and sparse. I am 23 now and have lost a significant amount of hair, people freak out when I tell them I am 23, I look like im 40 or something. I am also suffering from premature hair greying so that adds to the turmoil. About 60% of my hair is grey. Everytime I go out with my friends, I feel so depressed at the sight of a full head of thick black hair. All it takes to spoil a great day is a look in the mirror. I was a very handsome guy, had a great personality and my hair was very dense, thick and pitch black but thats when genetics decided to spoil the day. I feel so depressed sometimes when I look at the mirror, I’ve become very nervous over the years and I’m tired of fighting with my feelings for the past 5 years dealing with this mess. My confidence has shattered and this is taking so my much of my attention that I cannot focus on what is important in life. I see my friends going out, getting girlfriends, checking out 20 year olds and everytime I look at a 20 year old she thinks I’m some sick 30 year old hitting on college chicks. I don’t know how to deal with this and I have made myself to believe that I’ll be made to suffer for life for no fault of my own. I know people say “its just hairloss, suck it up” but I wouldn’t want this curse to haunt the worst of my enemies.
Hi Worried,
While it is possible for guys your age to begin seeing the signs of early onset male pattern baldness, what you describe sounds more like hair breakage.
If you have noticeable blond roots and the hair that you see falling out does not have a blond root, it is likely that you have somehow damaged you hair, perhaps by improperly dying it.
The only real way to know is to see a doctor who has a good handle on hair loss. He/she can check for follicular miniaturization which is the tell tale sign of Male Pattern Hair Loss. They can also check to see if in fact your hair is breaking as opposed to shedding.
Again, from how you described your situation it doesn’t sound like MPB.
As far as your family telling you what you want to hear…I can’t be sure either way.
We just launched a new message forum where guys like yourself can share your stories and get answers from veteran hair loss sufferers and qualified professionals. You can access it from this site by clicking on the community link in the top navigation bar or you can go directly to http://www.baldtruthtalk.com
You might want to upload some images to see if people think your hair loss is a noticeable as you think it is. In most cases it is not
Hope this helps!
Spencer Kobren
Is there a website or “anything at all” like this one for “women”???? I’ve been reading everything you guys have been saying and just wished I could find a place on-line where I could feel free to talk about some of my experiences, feelings, depressions, all related to my hair loss. I’m sooo bad that I don’t even enjoy going outside anymore, and I was always a female that stopped traffic where ever I went. (and that was NOT for a bad reason)! I was always use to men constantly trying to pick me up, meet me, etc. So, as you can imagine I am beyond devasated about my condition right now. Can ANYONE tell me where I can turn for help like you offer here?
Thanx a lot,
Laura
Absolutely, check out The Women’s Hair Loss Project:
http://www.womenshairlossproject.com They have a very active social network for women with hair loss:
http://community.womenshairlossproject.com
I am facing tons of depression since last 2 years.I am just 28 but looks like 40 years old. I made all success and milestone far ahead of my age, Struggled a lot in hope of dream when I would enjoy atleast one day for me and today I am no one.. (I rarely go to parties..Once one idiot mocked as uncle in group ..Just imagine..the heatache. I didn’t react to him) .I Why…….
I lost all my dreams due to high dipression…you know I never took drink..never smoke..never did any bad..my family got good hair history…I gave priority to family and my career..with principle of duty first and today I am looser…
If Gods comes after 5 years and bless me with the hairs,Money all..all..Still What abt these precious years of life…Are they coming back? I don’t want any..Just a common man beautiful life…
I would get married soon…worried a lot abt it. Even if she accepts me but would she be happy with that..or she would always think abt me..
I was working as teacher after studies.Postive attitude were and infact are always my words for all..But I always feel like lost when it comes to my appearance. It’s the fact that world sees you and later feels you….
Sometimes I think that I would wait till next Birth when I would again enjoy my life..my days..that happiness…
If you are like me..you would understand the feeling otherwise..it’s all nonsense for you….
Every thing is reversible. I can do anything..any thing..can concur entire world …Nothing is impossible..But I can’t win with myself….
I didn’t share these feeling since time…Feeling relaxed and friendly to write here…
Some where I read that baldness signifies love and kindness..I would pray for all of us that the compensasion for it is planned….
(Just rough feeling mail)..thx for the common place…
I am elated to finally find out that I am not the only person going through severe depression as a result of hair loss. I am currently 26 and I started noticing my hair was thinning when I was around 20. I sported cornrows all of my highschool years (98-01), so I could never notice that my hair was thinning. It wasn’t until a couple of weeks after my mother died in 03′ that I decided to cut my hair. Once I cut off all of my BEAUTIFUL HAIR, I noticed a tiny bald spot on the top of my scalp, and it’s been 3expanding ever since. As a result,I suffer from depression that leads to me constantly sporting a hat everytime I go out.My being uncomfortable with myself even leads to me trying to hide my baldness in the confines of my own home…. no.. not even my siblings notice my baldness as a result of me trying to wear a stocking cap over my head. Worst of all, my reluctance and trying to hide my baldness permeates into my interpersonal relationships.. more directly, women. Seeing as to how I ALWAYS wear a hat when Im out, women generally assume that you have hair if you aren’t completely shaved. Because I wear cornrows, the length of my hair extends to my shoulders, which gives the impressions to women that I have long,flowing hair. However, when they ask to see my hair I’ll tell them that it is not done, and I’ll show it to them when its done… but that time never comes, and eventually frustration sets in on both parties. I hate going bald! Sometimes I wake up wishing I hadn’t woken up in the first place. Right now Im struggling internally on whether I should shave it all off or use remedies i.e rogaine, surgical procedure. I feel for everyone going through this. Im going through a mid life crisis and its hard to see the light
-Mike
I honestly can’t believe this is happening to me so soon in life. I was once told that balding only comes from your mom’s side of the family. What a load of bs. No one on my mom’s side is bald that i know of, but my dad is completely bald at almost the age of 50, and it looks like i’m taking after him. I always knew that someday i might go bald beginning around maybe the age of 30 since that’s when my dad started loosing his hair and i tried to make myself ok with that, but i’m only 21 and am finding my hair thinning in the back already.
I started noticing it about a year ago and what’s worse is that the time i started loosing my hair was around the same time that i had just broken up with my girlfriend of 2 years. Talk about kickin a guy when he’s already down. Not only do i have to deal with loosing the first and what i believe is the only women i’ll ever be in love with or even want to be in love with, but then i start loosing my hair on top of it all.
I literally think about my hair loss now EVERY DAY. It’s so depressing. I’m tired of wearing a hat everywhere i go, and i don’t want to cut my hair off. It’s short as it is, and if i buzzed my head with bare clippers probably wouldn’t even be noticeable (atleast i hope), but i know the day is going to come when even using clippers won’t hide me going bald. I see that day as dooms day and there’s no avoiding it. I’m f***ed and there’s nothing i can do about it.
I don’t even like thinking about getting a hair transplant. I don’t trust any doctor cutting into my scalp. I’ve seen pictures of some of the horror stories that others have went through by taking that road. Then if the hair transplant is horrendous, you don’t even have the option anymore of wearing ur hair short or bald because of the ridiculous scar circling the lower part of ur head from ear to ear.
I’ve heard from some guys that after taking propecia they can’t get their dicks hard anymore or have trouble having children. Even if there is only a slight chance of becoming unable to perform anymore after taking this drug, i couldn’t even dream of taking that chance. I mean seriously–risking the chance of not being able to get a hard on again, possibly meeting a woman who would accept you for who u are, and becoming completely embarrassed when she finds you can’t do s*** with ur limp d*** — i don’t think so.
Stem cell research seems to be the only real hope out there, but that’ll never happen. They always keep saying and saying it’s only about 5-10 years away. It’s a timeline which keeps moving with time.
I can’t commit suicide because i believe anyone who does so would go straight to hell for that, but sometimes i wish someone else could just do it for me and spare me this agony and depression.
Hi
I know exactly what everyone on this site is going through and how they feel. I was about 18 or 19 when I first noticed my hair was receding. People can be very cruel, they used to say all sorts of things about my hair, making jokes and comments, and although I may have laughed it off, deep down I just wanted to die, they had no idea what it was doing to me. When you’re young, you’re concerned about your looks, and this includes your hair, and I’ve become obscessed with my hair, it really gets to me, I’m 34 now and it still bothers me, I feel that it’s been a fighting battle to get it looking right. I’m sure it has caused my depression, I find it hard to be happy, I don’t want to be depressed about it, so if I’m depressed about it, I feel that the hair has won, it’s beaten me, it’s made me depressed, but also I can’t be happy because I’m not happy with it. So the way I try to deal with it is by trying to do something about it, like taking medication, I can’t shave it off, I would feel that’s beaten me, and I hate when people say, “oh, just shave it off”, that really gets to me. I find it hard to have my photo taken, or look in shop windows. So I hope what I’ve said helps other people about how they feel.
I started going bald prematurely when I was 17 because I took accutane. It was completely unexpected because my family genes are pretty good in terms of hair loss, and I can’t think of anyone in my extended family with a bald head. Initially, it was really depressing for me… taking a drug to get rid of my serious acne and winding up bald…not the best trade-off. But in a way having already dealt with the emotional pain of acne has made this whole balding thing a little bit easier to deal with. I
I read a lot of the comments on here and just wanted to say to people…if you are going bald there is no point in feeling bad about it because everybody does at some point. When I first started losing my hair I was depressed and I would dread taking showers and hate waking up in the morning, but then I realized I’d just need to find a new way to feel confident and attractive so I hit the gym pretty hard and now I’m in great shape and feeling great about myself. Since I had pretty thick hair to begin with I haven’t had to shave it yet but when that day comes I’m pretty sure I’ll be ready for it.
All of you guys can do it too – if you are spending all your time looking in shop windows and mirrors, and worrying about how you look…keep in mind that everyone else on the street is doing the same thing; even someone with a great head of hair could feel completely depressed about a different component of their appearance. If you can fake confidence, you will eventually find it.
I would say there’s no point spending money on propecia or rogaine because I’ve already had to deal with awful side effects from taking accutane (not just thinning hair). I think its better to get in shape, to accentuate something else about you that makes you feel good – and to stay busy so you aren’t always thinking about hair. But that’s just me.
I started going bald at age of 18 and am now 23 and pretty much all gone now. I really have dealt with this bad and no matter what, im constantly thinking bad things 24/7. im so depressed and cant look in any reflection as this makes me so worse, I am getting really bad OCD. I really no i should get over it but its been 5 years now and really dont know what to do, ive tried spending money on everything basically but its never going to be the same. I absolutely have no confidence and feel like my life has been cut short and i cant stop looking and wishing that i was like my friends. Im near on completely bald and i still only look about 16 years of age. I really wish that i felt hope. I am very lucky to have a girlfriend who supports me but I presume I drive her crazy with this human defect. I really cant concentrate on anything else apart from this and its ruining my life.
reading this doesnt make me feel better but reassures me that im not alone and that someone out there understands how i feel.
thanks for reading. apologies for the grammar.
Mark, that is the best outlook I have read about going bald. Everyone should take a chapter out of his book and just let it be. Life if too short to worry about something like being bald. Sure it makes you stick out in a crowd, but why not take it as a reason to reinvent yourself. Bad feelings will always lead to depression.
As for hair transplants, I have considered them, but have decided to not go through with a cosmetic surgery that will leave my head scarred for life. I am 22 and like mark, have also taken accutane and noticed my head balding at 17. I still wake up every morning wishing I had hair and now I have decided to put that lunacy to the wayside.
This web site/ community is a doing a great service to balding people looking for answers. My best answer right now: deal with it, work on your body, mind and spirit. Be a good person and good will come. Think about yourself as bad, ugly and disfigured, you’ll become depressed… So just live in the positive light.
I wish I found it that easy.
I am a woman and as such would like to say I cannot imagine why all you men think you are not attractive because of balding hair. There are pl;enty of attractive men- some of whom have hair and some of whom are bald- there are also plenty of men who are not so attractive- with or without hair. Your hair is only 1 part of you- and yes I understand that you see it as a very important part. But believe me, attractive eyes, a great smile, and a strong healthy body etc all do the trick to attract females just as much as (you think) hair does. Confidence and a devil-may care- attitude are also very attractive. Please stop apologising for yourselves and if you feel it is necessary to compensate (it isn’t) sharpen up on your other female- attracting weapons.
The main thing for me is that everybody says it’s normal to go bald, but I would have liked to wait until my mid 40′ies … and even then I wouldn’t have liked it, but I wouldn’t have complained. I’m 23 god dammit, I’m not supposed to look in the mirror and try to cover my reseeding hairline. I have good things in my life and though im not a sexy beast I have a funktioning body, a normal apperanse otherwise, friends and family. But the constant tought of my hairline is always bugging me, everytime I see my reflection. l know how trivial it is, and how little my friends and family think it matters. It’s like haveing a grain of sand in my eye… always there annoying me. And if I complain people would answer you could have been blind, stop complaining.
I lost 10 years of my life because of my hairloss, and the battle isn’t finished yet. Im dead inside and depressed. I can’t enjoy life anymore. i got no friends, never had a girlfriend and im still living with my parents because of this shit. Im tired of living in a dark world and seeing other people enjoying life and i can’t.
I got no control of my hairloss, but my hairloss has it over me, its like a virus or cancer in my head that kills me slowly.
I know that many people don’t understand this problem, many people think that hairloss is just a little problem, but it can destroy your whole life and im one of them.
My brother lost also his hair at 17y and i was one of them who could not understand how this problem can control your life, but when it hit me, then i know how it feels.
The worst thing is not having this problem, but the biggest problem is that there is not cure.
There are pills like dutasteride and propecia, but if ur hairloss is very aggressive like mine, then those pills will only work for a few years, and if u read al these side effects about propecia, then u will think twice of taking them and i know it because i already used both of them
One day there will be a cure for baldness, but too late for me.
I agree. When hair loss isn’t happening to you personally, it’s not a big deal. My hair loss has changed my life and am still battling major depression. I don’t know how to shake it. I’m 32 years old and hide under a ball cap. I don’t go to functions where I cannot wear my cap. It’s insane, but again, cannot shake this. I’m at the point where I just want to live my life and enjoy life while I’m still fairly young. I’m considering having a hair transplant. People ask, “Why would you spend thousands of dollars for a hair transplant?” They just don’t understand. Self-confidence and happiness are more important to me than $$$$$$. Self-confidence and happiness are priceless.
i really wish it was that easy
So I’m sixteen and going bald. It really sucks. Like really badly. I just want to know if there’s a light at the end of the tunnel. Will I ever accept this? Please tell me I will… please tell me it won’t continue taking over my life the way it is. I’m totally miserable, it’s all I can think about. I want to stop being so unhappy.
I’ll never forget when I realized I was actually losing hair. I was 18. I had a job at an afterschool daycare and I was outside playing with the kids around a play structure. A fifth grader was above me getting ready to go down a slide and said, “Man, you have a sand pit.” I wasn’t sure what he was talking about until I got home that night and actually did a full scan of the top of my scalp. My heart dropped that night, and the obsession with my scalp and the insecurities would consume my life from that point until now. I’m turning 30 tomorrow. I’m actually happy to be getting older because now my age is finally catching up with my baldness. I’m lucky to have married early while I still had some hair, and I’m also lucky to have a wife that loves me for who I am and not what my head looks like. Even with the support, I am still battling with periods of depression. Some weeks are better than others, but overall my baldness has taken a huge chunk out of my confidence and social interaction. I get jealous when I see 60 year old guys with a full head of hair. It’s almost comical how much I dwell on it. I have found ways to feel good about myself, and just when I feel like I’m finally over it – BAM – I wake up and look at my ugly head in the mirror and look forward to shaving my head again. I never used rogaine or any other hair treatment, and actually feel good about it. I refuse to fork over money to those corporations. It’s almost as if they don’t want to find a cure for baldness, because of all the money they make each month off of us. Why find a cure for them when they are making us rich. Just one of my conspiricy theories.
It felt good to find this website, and even better to know that there are other people out there that share my thoughts. Stay strong my bald brothers. I’m hoping that god is doing this as a test for our us and our character, and when we walk through the pearly gates it will seem as though we had never lost the hair in the first place and we will once again be blessed with our thick heads of hair. Take care!
I’m 23 and really bummed about my hairloss. I first noticed my receding hairline when I was around 17 or 18, and so far could hide it. But recently it’s become obvious
I am constantly looking in the mirror and obsessing over it, and it’s really getting in the way of my confidence and happiness. It’s causing me to be depressed. Shaved heads look cool on some guys, but I have a weird head and a big nose so it wouldn’t look good on me.
On top of that, I’ve been struggling with some ED issues since I was 17, and that has hurt my confidence enough already, and caused a lot of depression and anxiety. I’m not sure what to do – I’m getting therapy for that stuff and hopefully I’ll be able to bounce back from all this.
It’s nice to have a community of people who can empathize with this difficult experience. It sucks. A lot. But hopefully we’ll all get through it.
I was 19 when I first noticed hair falling by the dozens. The intense dandruff in addition to loads of strands just falling one by one in hundreds EVERY SINGLE DAY! I ignored it thinking my dad wasnt bald, my relatively older brother had a thick head of hair and the rest of my maternal and paternal uncles, grandfathers were far from bald. I relaxed.
At 20, a friend ( obviously he was secretly suffereing from baldness himself, I have noticed men who are starting to suffer from something notice moreso than others, like an overweight person always looks at another person watching their weight) .
I realised my temples were waning . A thick head of hair but waning deep ended balding temples. I went on minoxidil at 21 and carried on upto 23. Hair stil falling by the dozens but for some reason this medication made it look thick inspite of it. Every time i combed my hair, fifty hair coming out at one time. My family said OH YOU WILL NEVER BE BALD. YOUR FOLKS HAVE A FULL HEAD OF HAIR.
At 25, today, I cant deal with the pressure of baldness and have shaved it off with bald patches and hair quality reduced drastically. it gave me respite and felt gr8 for some time as the shaved head looked even in the beginning . But now even my shaved head , you can see where my horse shoe is forming. and how! I still have hair all over except for the temples.
Nevertheless, it is apparent that its balding in a horse shoe pattern.
Girls at 21 and 22 are treating me like some 35 year old man hitting on them in clubs. Guys keep poking their youth as compared to me.
I am deeply hurt. I dont meet my family because my brother pokes fun at me along with my uncles who have a thick head of hair even today.
I go to the gym, and realise how unattractive, a horse shoe looks on me. I am 25 years old.
I want to kill myself right now. I dont have a girlfriend. Being a South Asian guy, its even more difficult to get one as white girls prefer well white men – if they like coloured he has to be sortov exceptional
Coloured South Asians – simply out of the question! They dont like balding young men.
16 year olds in my country end up calling me uncle and im 25.
I want to restore hair and I cant afford it. Life is not fun anymore ! Wish it would and could be but it isnt!
To Sammy:
Hey Sam, I’m losing my hair in the temples too. It’s really tough to look in the mirror now, even though I stare at the missing hair for a long time. I’m trying a few natural things right now since I’m nervous about the Rogain and oral drugs. For you, I think you should see a dermatologist. The dermatologist will help you understand what options you have. If there are no options that work, the only option is to be you with less hair. Think about it!!!! You are so much more important than your hair!!!! I don’t know you, but i would take you as my friend any day, but if you give me a bag of your hair, I would not want it. My perspective is that if I can’t save my hair by my natural treatments, I will have to live with it. There are so many things that I can do where I don’t need hair to do it, like EVERYTHING. And hey, why would you want a girl that likes you for just your hair. Girls like guys with confidence and a job. And you can have confidence with balding!!! I hope you have a job! Even the girls have things about them that they are not pleased about. Everybody has something that’s a big deal to them, but small to other people. Look, give your hair 1% attention. Give the rest of your life 99%. This is the only way that you will be happy and find a great girlfriend too.
it is so depressing man!! omg!!!
I started losing my hair at age of 21 too, i am not 28, although I managed to slow down my hair, but I could not put a stop to it!!
I am extremely depressed because of it, but of course I hide it so ppl dont noticed my depression.
Now I can not even hide my hair loss anymore, and because of it, I refuse to go out on dates, I refuse to talk to girls, and I refuse to go out to clubs & etc…
we guys all we have it our hair, without it?! whats the point of living?
I have a nice body, and nice face, but a balding head!! at age of 28… :\’(
every-time I run my figures through my head, I wana start crying!!
I just also found out my thyroid has problems which also causes hair loss, If my thyroid gets fixed, and my hair doesn\’t come back I have no choice but to spend 8grand doing transplant specially in the middle of my college now, this is not going to be easy!!
:\’(
To all you guys out there I feel the exact same. I’m 22 and have lost most of mya hair at the front. People do say things like its fine etc but when it effects you individually its extreemly depressing. Simply comments such as ‘you could do will a little hair on your head’ or ‘your hairs reeceded well back’. I have finally got to the point where I am going for a consulation tomorrow form hair restoration. i dont know how much it will cost of if it will actually work but I feel I need to do this for myself. I use to be a right party animal and now I dont go out because i’m so concerned about it.
When i got in to my teens i became fat and got bitchtits. I slimmed down but the titties remained. But i coped. I changed my style, buffed up and started an individual rocker look.
Man i was a rocker! Not the one´s who don´t get it! I was the one who got it. The sickening thing was that the only thing people gave me compliments for was my hair, telling me i looked like a model. Even women just walked up to me and said, damn you look like a celebrety. I started loosing hair when i was 19-20yrs. Started with Propecia but it didn´t work. My doctor even just ignored me when i had tears in my eyes! Though i understand him, he deals with cancerpatients! But anyway it was hard. Not anyone understanding. When my friends went out clubbing and such, well guess who stayed at home.! Today im 27, trying to date older women. I googled this page after i got a funny look from my neighbor, she is hot but older. I usually wear caps and hats, but this time i had to leave the appartment and she showed up. We always flirt, this time she bareley wanted to see my face.
Today i suffer from depression, social- phobia, general anxiety disorder and a variety of sleep disorders. The sleep- condition is medical.
I just don´t get it, something as hairloss can´t be cured? Im pretty bleak and when i shave i look funny, then you always have to shave and it hurts, your skull bleeds and it stings. You can´t just be sitting around one friday when a friend calls late and asks if you wanna go out. It´s not like fixing your hair and then put on a t-shirt and run outside. You have to trim the hair, then wet it, use shaving cream, then shower, use moisturizer and have a slight tan. And do you know how easy it is to miss on a few strokes of hair that end up flying behind your ear? This process takes a hour or more. If you bleed then it takes even more time. And after one day, guess what? The halfmoon behind your head appears.
How would you feel doing this every single day just that you don´t look like an old man?
This is one of the main reasons i hate going outside, this is one reason i fear women, this is one reason that all of my freaking youth was stolen. and the options are….
Hairplugs? Plug in hair from your neck? So you look lika a doll? What if you loose all of your hair and the plugged ones are the only ones that remain?
Propecia? A pill that doesn´t do shit, it evens out the baldness that is all. Your erection goes limb, you get testicle pains. And you keep loosing hair. After using this shit for 3½ years i realized still i was getting bald and needed to shave. Do you now how expencive this shit is in my country? It´s almost 200dollars for a month´s supply! It´s prostate medicine, it is not really that expensive to manufacture. But when it comes to taking advantage of those who don´t get the lucky streak in life, well then there is an whole open market for this.
Rogaine, don´t get me started, shit that you put on your head and then you need to fix it with some products. Guess what? Your hair will look like shit.
Lazer? Hmm, an expensive treatment that doesn´t do shit.There is a guy who did a tretment with all of these so colled medically proven methods and wasted almost 5000 dollars. Still he ended up wearing a wig.
My friends talk shit about bald people, that they look nasty and shit. Women say man he´s getting bald and will not get a woman anymore.
My own father just gave me a wierd look and then quickly looked away, like it is something to be ashamed of. MY OWN FATHER! And the bastard has a full set of hair.
My identity was lost and my life ended up in solitude. i did it all, supplements, treatments, worked out, even took tranqs against stress. Nothing worked. NOTHING WORK`S!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
We can´t cure baldness today in the year 2010? WE CAN`T CURE BALDNESS IN THE YEAR 2010? WTF!?
I lost my hair due to my anti-seizure medication. I used to have a very thick and soft head of hair that the ladies loved a lot. I started to go when I was 23 and married. I am 34 now. I am now bald on most of the top of my head. I shave my head so I don’t feel ridiculous. I hate it so much it burns inside.
What is worse is the fact that my dad who is 65 has a full head of hair. Sure it is gray, but it is very thick. His uncle is even older and also has a full head of hair. My moms side of the family really has no problem with hair lose either. Even my younger brother has hair down to his damn waist. It makes me sick.
It really pisses me off to no end. I feel like I have been cheated and robbed. I feel like a piece of me is missing.
What is even worse is that my wife does not understand how I feel about it. She thinks I am over reacting, that I should just get over it. “Bald is sexy” she says. She says she likes it. But still she comments on how sexy some heavy metal stars are. They have f*cking huge heads of hair. None of the stars she comments on are bald. NONE. I think she is lying to me to make me feel better. I think she is full of crap.
I feel normal about it most of the time. What can I really do that will work for me? Nothing as far as I can see. But some days for some reason it really gets me down. I don’t really know what to do about my depression from losing my hair. It is all messed up.
For me balding was inevitable and I saw it coming as early as 18. Add 10 years to that today and I’m completely bald and shave off whats left.
For me, the serious balding that cleaned off the rest came at about 24. This was a turning period in my life. Balding itself was merely a catalyst for whats happened since. Here’s the hard and fast reality I face today.
1. Still dating someone who accepts my baldness. If we break up, I suspect I wouldn’t want to date again (Let alone find someone who wants to date me)
2. People have stopped saying I’m handsome.
3. Kids at the school I teach laugh at me every day reminding me of my reality. They also tell me how ugly I look and tell me to wear a hat. It’s humbling and humiliating but it helps me deal with it.
4. I’ve lost motivation for living and entered into consistent depression. I contemplate suicide every day. Again, its not directly all from hairloss, but thats when things turned.
5. I don’t go out much anymore and girls don’t want to talk to me.
6. I don’t want to get married or ever have kids anymore. I’m not willing to pass on my genes.
7. I have given up on my qualifications and want to leave the city and become a farmer or something.
8. I still have my true friends and I get to watch them have their share of fun. Inevitably, through my own lack of desire and societies lack of acceptance, I get sidelined and become the party pooper.
9. I realised that confidence can only get you so far. There are still some deeper seated stereotypes that will always exist for bald people. Sure you can shrug them off, but they will still stand in the way.
10. Some men will look great without hair, but most don’t. One shoe does not fit all.
Again, I realise that many of the problems or issues I have are probably inherent and I’m not looking for a scapegoat. I don’t even want to imply that hairloss caused these issues. But to some extent it will exacerbate issues. I have low self esteem and genetically depression is right up my tree. Having a quick glimpse in the mirror does provide a hard fast reality check that can trigger depression.
For now, I’m not looking solutions to hairloss. I’m over it and have accepted my fate. I’ve already lost faith in society. Hairloss is seen as a disability throughout the world (I’ve traveled) and evolution has little place for it. For me, I got to focus on whats left to enjoy out there.
If I find life painful and lacking meaning in the next few years, I will probably consider pulling the plug. I just feel I have to wait for my parents to pass on to the next life. I feel that I at least owe them that favor.
I hope you can draw something useful from this. Didn’t mean to drag anyone down into my own abyss.
HArry
Hello. My name is Howard.
I started going bald during my senior year of high school. I’m now 21 and a horseshoe shape on the top of my head is evident. For the last first year of college, I parted my hair a certain in order to cover up a bald spot on the back of my head. Then, the top of my hair started thinning and my already low self-esteem dropped. It got to the point where I would avoid sitting or standing under direct sunlight or overhead lights in a room because it would make it that much more evident how bald I was.
I would stand in front of the mirror for hours sometimes, hoping that I could will my hair back to its original thickness. Every time I passed by a reflective window on a car or a building or a puddle of water, I would stop and see if my hair looked acceptable.
Then, the winter came. Finally it would be acceptable to wear a hat in and outdoors; and so I did. I never took my ski cap off. People began talking. They wondered if I may have been deathly ill or something. Looking back, I suppose I was.
Being born with what’s called “Bat Ears” where one ear is huge and the other is normal, I knew that shaving my head wasn’t an option. I thought about this long and hard. It was between bald freedom with ugly ears or shameful imprisonment with a thin head of hair.
Sometime in the cold month of February, I had had enough. I decided that I would shave the damn thing off – completely. I locked myself in my room, took my electric razor, and buzzed it all off. I was so nervous about what people would think about my bare head that I still kept the hat on (also because February’s a bad month to be hairless).
Finally, some time after that, I regained confidence. i didn’t care what people might think. I marched out of my room – my head now stubbly – and showed off my bald-ish head to all. Since then (4 months later) I haven’t turned back. I don’t look in the mirror obsessively anymore, and I certainly don’t whine about how cruel fate is for giving me a case of male pattern baldness.
In fact, realizing that I saved thousands of dollars on balding “solutions” by shaving my head, I’ve decided to get otoplasty (ear surgery) in a few months.
A word of advice:
If we live life thinking about how lifeless a balding life is, that’s not living at all. Some of you are mentally crippled by MPB. I think that is so sad. Just get out there and be yourself. Are you a person, or are you the hair on top of your head? So what if you have a big nose? So what if you have weird ears? Just shave your head. Keep it that way for 30 days. If you don’t like it after that, then grow it back to normal length.
It is adversity such as balding or being fired from your job or being completely and utterly alone that makes the human race thrive, damnit. Become empowered. Become confident. Don’t let it get to you.
man i know how u feel i’m 19 and am louesing a lot of hair every day i think im going bald. i got a bald spot in the back off my head.i feel like my life is over man…..
Thank you.
HI, I started losing my hair at 15 and now im 18. This problem has basically ruined my life, and I hate that my youth was taken away.
I had beautiful hair, I was one of those kids that always used gel to spike it up and the such. During my sophomore and junior years of high school My hair was very thin, but I was afraid of shaving it , I was in denial. It killed my social life, I hated playing soccer now because if it was windy or if it rained people would see how bald I was. My friends made fun of my hair saying it looked like an animal on top of my head, and it really did, I just let a lot of hair grow to cover the baldness. I hated going to parties and places were there was a lot of light because of it. When Junior year ended it felt into a horrible depression during the entire summer and dissapeared, I locked myself in my room and only came out to the bathroom and to get food. To this day, it is the darkest period in my life. Senior year came around , and because I was a good student I managed the courage to get out. I buzzed my head and reunited with the few friends I had. I became more confident but never quite was the same. The balding has advanced much more, and people of course now know that im balding, and im tired of the cruelty.
I know cut my hair very short, almost like shaved. Im 18 and I look like im 30. I often play soccer and they all mock me saying that Im old, calling me grandpa and what not. I’ve tried to stay strong but Im tired and obssessed with my balding. I dont like pictures taken of me. I dont go to parties. I wont go out if i cannot buzz my hair to at least look acceptable. I hate standing near the light where my head will basicaaly shine. I envy the hair my friends have and always think im the ugliest guy everwhere I go. I feel like my teen years have been wasted because of this. I cannot stop thinking about and people dont make it any better. it is now the summer after my senior year, and I’ve become deeply depressed again. This time i really shaved my hair and I hate it. I dont want to go outside. I’ve even broken up with my girlfriend because I am so ashamed of her seeing me like this. I hate the fuckers and the so called friends who constantly call me old and torture me for my baldness, and I hate having to brush it off like It doesnt affect me. I fucking give up , Im tired, I don’t want to accept, now I just want to commit suicide.
I have read most of the comments her and its made me feel alot better in myself. im 21 next year and have started to noticing thinning. I had a receeding hairline from as long as i can remember but can cling onto the hope i wont go completely bored as my dad has a receeding hairline and still managed to keep all his hair. Mum said i take after her dad when it comes to hair and as ive never met him i have to take her word for it, hoping that tht cliche doest apply to me or cancels it self out.
ive started preparing myself for baldness. my mates joke about it when im there so its kinda helped me accept it guess. But when theres a lass you like and she notices it does hit you back quick alot.
I havent had that much trouble in attracting girls. when i go out with my mates i could say i hold me own your could say. I know its easier said then done but if you ignore that its there u somehow forget about it for the day.
——— if there is any advice i could give people its to read ‘ the game’ by neil strauss it boosts your confidence and makes you feel like you can do what hes doing. O ya and hes bald too. A book that focuses on attracting women but also a very good read. ive read it more then once and when im down brings me to be slighty more happy even if its only for seconds ——–
Paul, UK
God
I feel for you. I can because I could have written those words 30 years ago.
All of it, from the wind, to the light, to those “friends”.
I gotta tell you though, a couple things.
1. Those friends are cracking on you NOT because they are mean, they are just being thoughtless. You see, they don’t see it as a big deal. Because from THEIR point of view, you are still you .. They liked you BEFORE you started losing your hair and they like you now…..its just not a big deal……..
but thats because THEY ARE NOT LOSING THEIR HAIR and they don’t know how you feel when you are around the opposite sex. Believe me, if they knew, it would be different. But they like you, so your hair loss doesn’t bug them.
2. That said, you MUST TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR HAIR LOSS, or it WILL take care of you. It will take away your life. Figure something our, ANYTHING that will help you cope.
My prayers.
Oh yeah
Someone mentioned a mirror. I seriously impaired my eyes by skewing my vision whenever a mirror was around, in homes, when I went to buy clothers,, etc. I didn’t want to see myself, so I purposely unfocased my eyes. Even in a glass window I woud do this. The headaches I got from this.
Its amazing what we seem to go through when you lose your hair. I skipped school on windy days, rainy days, etc. If I was at a table (IF I absolutely had to be somewhere where dinner was being served) I would bolt up and pretend to go to the bathroom so noone would stand over me and see my bald spot (like they could see it anyways).
I’m so ashamed now, I got SO DRUNK my wedding day that I almost collapsed at the alter. The week before I started obsessing on how beautiful my wife would look coming down the alter, and all I could think of was how horrified all her and my families would be that this beautiful, vibrant, loving woman could marry a balding ugly old looking dude like me……….fuck me.
How bout funerals? How many I missed OF GOOD FRIENDS, that I just couldn’t go because of fear that old friends would see me? Such a jerk….all cause of this crap.
I would just like to make a comment regarding anyone thinking of taking dubious medication or drugs that claim to restore hair.
Im 42 now but as a teenager my life was hell due to moderate to severe acne, which in my opinion is just as debilitating as hair loss. At 18 I went on a course of drugs which cleared my acne up almost completely but a year later I was hospitalized with severe pain. I had to have part of my bowel removed and its highly likely this was a side effect of the medication I took the year before. I had a large scar on my stomach as well as scarring on my face.
By the time I was in my mid to late 20s my hair started to fall out and so the hormone which had destroyed my confidence in my teenage years was now coming back to kick me in the teeth again in my adult years. It was as if the Testosterone- DHT couldn’t break through my skin so it killed my hair. The medical experience I had with my acne though was a warning to me regarding hair loss treatment and I think I was right to avoid it then since I have heard and read that certain hair loss medications can destroy a mans sex drive for years if not permanently. The side effect of my acne treatment had probably saved me from going down the road of suspicious hair loss treatment. If drugs improve your condition to some extent, they will destroy some other component in your body.
I have lost about 40-50 per cent of my hair now and I think, although I find it hard to accept but last year I had a nervous breakdown. Years of anxiety, stress, not having the confidence to do better at jobs I had or talk about my hair loss finally caught up with me at 40. I couldn’t cope with work and went on anti depressants.
One of the things that saved me was I started to cry in front of my mother. It sounds incredible but I just simply let it out and it helped. You go down a tunnel until you almost die and then crawl like a baby again. Men need to be able to show their emotions far more in society and do it openly.
As an older man say compared to a man in his 20s who is losing his hair, I can only say that as you age it becomes easier. We just have to accept our bodies changing and age.
At 40 my sex drive is less than at 30, I have put weight on, your gums begin to recede, your ears produce more wax and weirdly enough unsightly hair. I will look different again at 50 and 60 and so on. I think as men and as humans we just need to learn to accept change.
When I see babies born with severe disablements or people starving to death on TV, the families of the 9/11 victims etc, reality sinks in and you become grateful for the things you have had in your life so far.
I just turned 22 last month and i have been balding since i was 16. i started washing my hair with nioxin when i was 17 and have used it everyday. unfortunatly it hasn’t done a damn thing for me.After highschool I turned to alcohol and smoking to make me feel better about my hair loss. I was a allstar athlete in high school , played junior hockey and played on national teams. Today i feel my hair loss has held me back from so many things.. Everyone tells me its ok theres nothing i can do about it. I see my father who has 8 brothers and all of them are bald, and are all still in denial about it. I hate how the media makes you feel like you have to have long flowing locks to be successful in life. Its unfortunate I feel like that but I believe its true. I am also a cancer survivor. I lost all my hair at the age of 8 and didn’t regrow it untill I was 10. Im guessing the critisim I received back than explains the feelings I have now to having no hair. I am lucky enough to be getting married next summer to the love of my life but its the little things im not excited about like wedding pictures and being in front of so many people at once.I hope I can get over this one day. I feel like im missing out on so much because of my hair loss. Everyone i know who is bald says it is a constant struggle everyday. they don’t go swimming with there kids because the water makes there hair look more thin, they don’t attend functions where they can’t wear a hat,and most of all they say they would rather just stay home to avoid the embarresment, and i feel the same way. I am glad to have found this site and see that there are lots more people like myself. I honestly dont care how I look. I just hate how you are looked down upon for not having hair.Hang in there everyone. Id rather be bald than sick or have a uncurible illness. This is comming from some one who is going through the same thing. Life is too short to dwell on something so little.
i am just 22 but i have already lost half of my hair..
It started when I shaved off my long curly hair for the summer of 2002, Like I tended to do when I was younger. Spontaneously cutting my hair off was what I was kind of known for. Until that day when I finished and looked at myself in the mirror……funny…the front of my hair doesn’t look at dark as th……wait! MOM!!!
So now I’m 30 now and my widows peek has been separated from the body of my hair. It’s a stand alone patch upfront that I try desperately to connect to the body with a comb down. I know it could be worse but that doesn’t matter does it.
It’s been a slow painful experience. And everyone(who is not losing their hair) thinks that I’m being a bitch. They have no clue what it does to us.
So because of this, I feel like not even an option for the opposite sex. I just go to work and make money, go home and drink&smoke. I don’t take rejection well so I protect myself by not going out. It’s embarrassing depressing bullshit .
I can’t compete with the guys at the bars/clubs, plus ladies are looking for taller dudes, which I’m not.
Short, single, and balding….that’s me. And the one thing i can control, my weight. I get shit for from my friends cause they think I’m to thin. Fuck
I started losing my hair whn I was 18. I used to have hair down to the middle of my back and when I graduated I decided to
cut it off , u know new look for a new chapter in my life. Needless to say I realized I was balding but didn’t su anything thinking only I could see it. I would come from work and my mom would yell at me stop messing with ur hair although I hadn’t touched it. One du I came home and she said what have u been doing to your hair it looks so thin. I got angry and began to cry, she didn’t know I was actually losing my hair since I had a full head of it jus a couple months earlier. I am now about to be 21 and I still suffer with this everyday. Some days I don’t wantto wake up, It has been years since I was happy with my appearance. I used to model for converse & D&G. Now my agency let me go because of my thinning hair . It has really made me depressed I look to god in hopes that one day my hair will come back or that I will come to terms with this demon.
hi lads im alex. im also a baldy who is suffering. i have been reading most of your storys and to be onist ive been blubbering though all of them. i feel so sorry for all of you. i can relate with all the comments made about the life of a baldy. i found out i was bald when i was waiting to be served in a shop. i looked up at the cctv screen and noticed this old bald man. i tuned around but there was no one there. thats when the horror set in. i was the old bald man. i never new my hairloss was that bad. i now have a hat basicly glued to my head, outdoors and in. im scared that my partner will one day leave me as when she fell for me i had a full flowing head of hair. she tels me that she is’nt bothered but this goes in one ear and out the other. ive got no confidence so no matter what people say, i cant bileve them. so what are we going to do. weight training was the answor for me. looking big and bald was the key that changed my life around. people now look at me differently. they are drawn to look at my muscles and not my baldy head. but this is not a cure it is just a way of camaflorshing the fact that im a bald crumberling reck. i think society should be more aware of what us guys go though. if you dont have the money for surgery or pills, what other help is there? from my own research, non. thankyou to the people that set this site up. its people like yous that helps guys like us. keep your heads up lads remember god give us our shoes and we have to walk in them. we are all beautifull in our own ways. if those girls cant see that than fxxk them. god also gave us hands!!! PEACE
I think it’s terrible that while today people can see each other on hand-held video screens and there have been numerous other breakthroughs “they” haven’t been able to fix baldness which admittedly looks bad on many (although there are exceptions). It may be cosmetic but it takes a psychological toll and society can be mean. Luckily (speaking for myself) I’m good at being unsocial and at least I’m not mean
.
I remember when I was the good looking one in the family. I remember how much pride it filled me with. Now I am 22 and balding and cant shake the thought of not being able to attract the opposite sex or people taking me seriously. i look like im 16 and it would not be a good look for someone who looks so young. Im tired of having to wear a hat or beanie wherever i go and not being able to look people in the eye when they are talking to me because im so worried about seeing their eyes make there way up to my receding hairline. I wish i didnt have to deal with this worry especially now when i should be concentrating on other more important aspects like school and girls. Why have we not cured this????? I did research and found that the FDA has made it virtually impossible for a cure to be found because of the cost and time it would take to find a cure. People tell me all the time to be greatful for the things I have and to forget about it but what is so frustrating is if i didnt have this receding hairline I would be so happy and wouldnt care what anyone thought because I had hair. This sounds rather conceited but im sick of the sadness this sickness causes. It may not kill me physically but it sure as hell kills me emotionally and mentally.
I began all the running and the screaming back in high school. Friends made comments “hey man you’re going bald!” It was so helpful. Friends were the worst, like they had no idea how much it hurt. I’m going to cut to the chase.
All the worrying, and topical treatments, and pills, and Hair Club for Men $$$, and hats, and surgery will NOT stop you from having less hair. I speak from the vista of being 60. You may not ever really LIKE losing your hair, but you have to confront it and get past it. Look, just do this. Go to any website about congenital birth defects. God makes some of us folks less pretty, and some of us get really shafted. Look at how some people have to try to get through the pain of repeated surgery and skin grafts. If you have your sight, your limbs, and have half a brain, you’re doing a damn sight better than a lot of people in the world who would give anything to be in your shoes…worrying about your hair.
I’m not making light of any of you and your suffering, everything I’ve read at this website brought back some tough moments. My very cute wife (and some former girlfriends before I married) were understanding about my wearing hair “units” hair (maybe I was just a good guy and they saw beyond my neurosis?)
But a good day in my life was when I QUIT wearing those expensive Hair Club “units”. Hey, they were frikkin wigs OK?, and I felt like a fool after while. When my little girl said “Dad, there is some kind of weird net in your hair”, that’s when I knew I had to be real, and just go with it.
Hang in there fellas, losing hair ain’t really the end of your world!
I’m 39 – It started in my late teens, and was finished going bald by the time I was 25. I went through it – the hats, the comb-over, the insults, the self-confidence spiraling down the drain along with the hair. The disbelief, the depression and self-medication. The dreams about having a huge head of hair! Then you wake up. It blows, no doubt about it.
But you can get through it. You just have to keep telling yourself that you believe in yourself, no matter what happens. Even if you are the lowest, slowest, ugliest baldest sorry sack of sh*t ever to walk the earth, you have to believe in yourself. Even (or perhaps especially) when it seems ridiculous, and even if you have to outright lie to your own face in the mirror, you have to keep telling yourself that you believe that you can do it.
“It,” by the way, isn’t “grow hair.” “It” is “be whoever you want to be, no matter what happens.”
And you are not going to do “it” DESPITE being bald. You are going to do “it” BECAUSE you are bald. I recognize that this sounds like a loaf of bull, but it isn’t. Gaining self-confidence while bald will reveal the strength of your character to you.
Go get a self-help book. My personal favorite is the 70′s classic “How to Pick up Girls.” (Just ignore the part about how to wear your hair.) But it doesn’t matter which one, they all say the same thing: Believe in yourself, and if you don’t, fool yourself and fake it until you do.
Bald is beautiful. Believe it, not because it is true, but because believing it will make it so.
I’ve read most of the stories here and I can definitely share your pains. My story might take a little longer, but I hope you can bear with me. First and foremost, I’ve always had great hair and taken a lot of pride on it. Not to mention that I look younger (face) than my age suggests
For the past few years, I’ve had two medical dysfunctions that\’s nearly broken my self-confidence and made me increasingly self-conscious in public. Remember, I said nearly.
1: I’ve had hyperhidosis since 18 (excessive sweating). So that means my shirts pretty much consists of black/navy. Even during spring,autumn and winter, I sweat profusely (it doesn’t smell any worse or anything though). So you can imagine how tough summers can get. Lots of layering, constantly keep my jacket on and other behaviour that probably appears strange to most.
2: I developed gynecomastia starting around age 14 and it got worse through the years. In other words: bitch tits. God, even I can\’t help but laugh at that. It started with puffy nipples and eventually my chest was noticeably bigger. As you can imagine, it was insanely embarrassing, and again it involved wearing a lot of dark clothing, layering, and I always had my jacket on during autumn and spring. For a few years, I didn’t go to the beach or ever take my shirt off in front of someone (not even my ex-girlfriend). However, 2 years ago, I got a surgery and it\’s been fixed since, and it looks completely normal now.
In spite of all of this, I still went to school/work regularly, I had many friends, a good social life, a beautiful girlfriend at the time. I was smart, fairly confident and funny. But, literally months after having the surgery for the chest, I started noticing that my hair was thinning. I was 20 years old.
That was it. That was the breaking point. I thought that since I had conquered one of those medical dysfunctions, and simply endured the other, I can finally move on and stop being so negatively self-aware in public. I thought I could finally start becoming a healthy, confident, young man. I was unfortunately wrong.
Now, at 22 years old, I sit at the back of every class (that\’s if I even attend class), I’ve lost most of those friends/girlfriend, I still sweat more than usual, I hate windy/rainy/sunny days since it simply makes my balding head look more noticeable. I’m already pretty short for a guy (5’6) so that’s something I’ve always dealt with all my life. It’s a hardknock life alright.
I simply can’t fucking take it anymore. I smoke more than I ever did and I hope everyday that I get lung cancer, or that I get hit by a car when I’m crossing the streets. I have no ounce of confidence left in me. None.
There’s no happy ending to this story, I’ve endured many medical problems (and personal problems) and yet there’s still always something else to battle. I’m 22 years old and I’m tired of battling. I’m gonna go have another smoke now and wish for lung cancer.
I don’t know about you guys but I strongly feel that if nothing else, hair loss tells us about one fact of life, that most of the world (girls who refuse to give you attention at all because of your looks, and guys who run their fingers through their shiny black heads of hair to make themselves look as better ‘mates’ as compared to you, in front of girls) sucks because of its materialistic ways, and inner happiness (like the one derived from meditating, or doing a job that you love) is much deeper than outer happiness, and certainly way more than what we think it to be.
To this, there is only one solution: Meditate, take the path of spirituality (and by this i mean advancing into the deepest levels of human consciousness through kundalini awakening (google it!)), and make a living out of some hobby or something that you’ve been willing to pursue your entire life.
I think the bitches out there are getting way more attention than they deserve to get, and i think we guys have locked ourselves up for more than enough time now.
Dear SB
Surgery places a lot of stress on the body and sometimes the stress can cause hair loss. Look after yourself, start going to the gym and stop smoking!
Start reading some great health/ diet/ juice books and get out there and challenge the situation!! I have two sons, both have had all sorts of problems, physical and emotional over the years. They have always felt so much better when they have taken resposibility and action to do something positive about it. Smoking and your current attitude is like a thick blanket blocking out all the light and your true beauty.. Come on, face the challenge and get tough and downright enthusiastic about it. You are young and life is out there and you have a right to be at the heart of it!
Come on, live for all those young men that don\’t have a choice and wont be here tomorrow! You can do it!!!
Being a woman, 25 years of age, and sufferring from FPB since 17, I somehow wished every day that I was a boy instead. That would make it easier for me.
Coming here, and reading through all these comments, I realise I was being unfair. My heart goes out to all of you.
I realise there are far greater medical problems in this world other than hairloss, but hairloss is a silent killer, very much like slow poison, killing a part of you everyday. What’s worse is that you know you are not going to die of it, and a part of you wishes that you actually did.
The depression and suicidal tendencies hair loss causes is not trivial, and funnily, to cure the depression, you must cure the hair loss first. Thats how its been in my case at least.
ive read every one of these comments all of you need to man up im 24 my hair started falling out and thinning a year ago its getting worse but all i did is shave my head and got on with life people have so much worse problems than this in the world people are dying of famine in third world countrys ect jus shave your head and get on with it stop caring what people think about you you dont look as bad as you think millions of people have shaved heads in this day and age seriously jus learn to laugh at yourself and get on with life
sorry bout the text style talk bad grammer ect lol
@GBB
I love you !
Like sb164 i have also had other issues in my life, not the least being serious sexual abuse when i was very young. I consequently suffered very debilitating personal esteem problems. I did overcome a lot of my issues, and became, eventually, quite confident again, excelling at work, and being pretty good in social situations…. But then the sudden, seemingly overnight hairloss…. This has completely destroyed any confidence i had regained, and is basically the final straw for me! Whatever platitudes some previous posters have written – if you are already at a low point, hairloss will affect you to a point where your life is really not a life at all – nothing short of a cure will make you feel any better about yourself. What really bothers me is that ‘baldness’ seems to be fair game for those ‘hirsute jokers’ who regularly crop up on TV shows (even sometimes in commercials), newspapers, radio etc. They really do not understand the hurt they can cause, and fuel the universal ridicule aimed at ‘baldies’. Now if the ridicule were to be aimed at race, sex, religion…..?
i’ve just turned 18 and ive been losing hair all over my head for about 3-4months, including sides and back. My hairline has receded a tiny bit however its always been slighty receded since i was a kid. Its getting depressing just the thought of going bald soon, as a buzz cut on me would look awful with my shaped head. However i still have little hope that its not MPB, due to my family not experiencing balding, except my uncle but not until he was about 35. I was wondering if it could be another condition that is causing my hair to fall out even though my hairline has receded a little.
My story:
Im a 28 year old man that lost all my hair at 22/23. About a year or two prior to this I had been wearing a beanie pretty much 24/7 and this probobly caused this, despite being told otherwise. All my life i’ve had EXTREMELY thick hair, and still do in the places that arn\’t thinning. I also had compliments about my hair from everybody. From the ages 17-19 pretty much every single girl I met wanted to date me. I was never, ever cocky though and suppose I was a \”nice guy\” of sorts. I was the most popular person in my college class. I went out every weekend and had so many friends. Since I lost my hair, my life has been utterly destoyed. I hate myself for being so vain and making such a big deal of it, but it\’s not a little hair ive lost, I have a worse hairline than my 52 year old father. My confidence was destroyed. In my opinion, if you were never a looker hairloss isnt so bad, but for me it has been devastating. I havent seen one single friend in eight years, have not kissed ONE girl in eight years. I went from being someone with 100 names on his phone and someone that would score with girls constantly to someone that hides at home. I now have no friends, and believe it\’s too late to make contact, plus I am too ashamed. I don\’t even have a facebook because I can’t put a picture up. I fear i’ll never have the luxury of friends ever again. All night I just lie awake and cannot sleep. My appearance has been made even worse because of this. I can\’t even kill myself because I love my family way too much. All anyone says is “its just hair, grow up” but I can’t. I wish I could. I now fear I have destroyed my life, certainly what should be the best period of my life (20s) beyond no return. I wish my family would understand I just want to give up, im just too tired now. Sorry for the long rant.
im just 26 now and got M shaped head and continuing the hair loss in frontal hair line.
im crieng alone some times from the last few days becz of this unwanted MPB. i didnt done any harm to anyone.. im always good, taken family responsibilities.. and didnt hv any girl friends till date. why god gave me this punishment…?
Recently im in love with one good girl.. and had a plan to propose her in this month. She is pretty good in looks, life style and person wise too.
I love her really and want to marry her.
She has seen me before 4 years when i was full of hair. i think she is also in love with me and definitely accepts if i propose.
But now i ve changed my decesion. im not going to propose her and i dont wish to pull her to hell..
She should be happy and should get a good husband with great looks..
I ve taken this decession becoz i just love her… :’(
anyone please help me to come out of depression..
im loosing control over me.. and getting full of tears..
Would any of you guys date a balding woman? I can’t help but wonder. I for one am losing my hair and I do think it’s much worse for women than for men.
I wish I could do something about it, but I can’t. it has been years that people know me as a bald guy, and I hate it. I hate when you can not do anything
@Luciana. Yes, definitely. Bald woman can be beautiful. Character and personality go a long way too …
Going bald is such a traumatic and drawn out thing. I lost my hair after going through chemotherapy and radiotherapy at 17, and it never grew back. Now I have to live with this constant battle everyday of getting up in the morning, unhappy with myself especially because I cannot stand the male pattern baldness. I feel as if my youth has gone; I missed out on so much going through cancer, that now that I have overcome it, I still am suffering in silence with mpb. I feel as if I cannot move on with my life. I have alienated all my friends through lack of confidence; I never cross the door, and my confidence is shot to pieces. I feel like I am 40 or 50 years old when I’m only 26. I shave my head now, but because my hair is black and my complexion is so pale, you can very easily see that I have MPB. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad if I went bald all over, but the pattern is just so gross I can’t stand the sight of myself. Baldness is horrible for a young person to go through, especially when everyone else is vying for sexual partners and life partners, and the TV has no young person who is bald to which they can relate. Best wishes to all of you going through the same as me. I hope you all deal with it better than I have.
I’m fed up of this going bald, i really feel for everyone who’s made comments on here, i know exactly how they feel. I suffer with body disformic disororder( in other words i hate pretty much everything abourt the way i look). I spent 3months in a bdd specialist unit. They really helped me, i come out of there a new man. i was still troubled by my apperence massively, but i felt like i’d been given another chance. i’d spent 8 years as a recluse because of my illness. But guess what, a year after coming out of hospital my hair starts to rapidly disapeer. I’m now beginning to go back to how i was. i’ve spent the last 3 days crying, i really can’t bear it. i dread going to the mirror, i comb it that way, i comb it this way, i can’t cover up the bald patches now matter how hard i try. I have that horrible plucking feeling when i comb it. I think ” oh no, that won’t grow back again”. I’ve taken to sleeping on my 2 seater sofa, i’m 6ft tall, my legs hang over the edge, i haven’t slept properly for weeks, i’m getting terrible back pains. Why am i doing that? Because i go to sleep on my back and wake up on my back, i’m scared of rolling over in my bed incase i pull more hair out. The nhs won’t fund hairtransplants, they see it as vanity, well when it’s causing myself and others on here to want and take their own life then they should have a rethink. I don’t know how much longer i’m going to be around because of this, hopefully not too long beacuse i’m really suffering. I hate life(again).
u r right i m just 19 and i m loosing my hair there is a bald patch on my head
doctors say tht it bcz of my hereditery .i feel so alone even my gf left me bcz of tht patch and i feel very ashame now i dnt go out with my frnds bcz my frnds make fun of me 
pls guys help me
it’s ironic to some extent that I’m a woman and I’m going through what a man normally does. my life is quite miserable I don’t go out with my friends much I don’t accept their invitation to their places I wear a kinda wig by the way and I live in a country that women are obliged to wear scarf I suppose that’s a mixed blessing to tell the truth. I’m pretty alone due to the fact that I’ve abandoned most of my friends for good . I don’t know If that sounds right to you but it’s to me. no one knows that I wear wig and they keep giving me beautiful compliments when they see my hair (wig) I feel bad I’m fake everything about me is fake .do u believe in reincarnation? I do .I believe if I got to be born again I’ll be given thick hair then I won’t be ashamed of who I am.
Hi all,
Its funny because what annoys me the most is not being able to accept the fact I don’t need hair. It annoys me that I am so concerned about the way I look. I started losing my gair when I was 21 , now I am 27 and it still sends me in and out of mild depression periods. The one thing I can say that makes me feel a bit better is the fact that I am in no way scared of the distant future regarding it- because most of the men we know will be ageing, getting sick ,dying,…. and of course balding. I doubt there are many men on this forum over the age of 50. It does hurt at a young age to lose the hair which is why I in a way look forward to getting older because those dudes who make fun of me being bald now will most likely be bald themselves. I read somewhere it effects 4 out of every 7 men. but for now- essentially what i desire is not hair but to not care about care. So surely it is some phycological thing regarding self image that is the problem for me and most others here. And yes how can I make this shit look good- shave it, go to the gym get a tan, look like Vin Diesel. But for alot of us our bodies weren’t built like that..(i.e Moby). But putting that aside i feel that if i were to find great success in career I doubt the hairloss would sadden me any longer (because young chicks like good looking guys- but older more mature women like ambitious successfuk guys ( something I am not right now but hope to be some day). But I do understand that this is much more of a problem for women as women in society today are judged on their looks.
At the end of the day I wish I could just stop thinking about it.
i just re-read my post and i really should be doing that before i post it to avoid spelling errors which is kinda embarrasing (spelling?) bcause I can’t seem to remove it. I typed quickly and hit the wrong keys (gair,care, successfuk)… LOL
I completely feel for everyone here. My situation is a little different but in the end, we all are in the same boat. I am now 26 years old and have always had a thick full head of hair untill last November. I was always told how thick my hair was and balding guys would be jelous of me..but i never thought that going bald was such a bad thing. I never knew what it feels like, untill now. My last haircut which was september of 2010, my barber repeatedly told me i have enough hair to cover 2 full heads of hair, and she continued to tell me her story of going through FPB.
Now some of you are probably wondering, how did this all happen to you. Well let me give you the cold hard truth. My mothers side of the family are all bald, and went bald when they were 16. My fathers side, they are pretty bald, but my father maintained a good head of hair untill he hit 40. I never thought it would ever happen to me, considering i maintained a full head of hair at the age of 25..surpassing anyone in the family. I never lost any hair in the shower.
However, i want to add that i wore a hat for about a year and half straight everyday because i was growing my hair out, and my hair was so thick and hard to style..i said to hell with it and just rocked a hat..not because i was hiding anything. I experienced massive shedding starting last thanksgiving, i would see hairs falling off my scallp, sitting on top of my head, in the shower, etc..i was losing as many as 2000+ hairs a day. I got nervous, i was so scared, immediately i noticed my hair thinning by the day. Around my crown area, I noticed a pretty thin spot, an area where just days before, the thickest of my hair rested. I was in absolute denial. I went to see a dermatologist.
Dermatologist diagnosed me with a fungul infection, and hairs continued to fall in front of him and he assured me it was because of the fungus. It had been on my scalp for far too long..possibly because of wearing hats and not properly cleaning my scalp. It had made my hairs weak and brittle causing them to fall out.
Now months later, i no longer feel like the same person I was. I lost my hair overnight. Gone are those happy moments/parties/girls/clubs..everything changed for mre. You guys have to realize, the instant affect it had on me is greater than anything else. I wasnt losing my hair like most of you guys, this happened all of a sudden.
My hairline is still straight, hair is still mostly thick on the top half, left side, but the right side and crown are very thin now. Everyday, it gets worse and worse, at this rate Ill be a norwood 7 in no time. I think back of that beautiful thanksgiving eve, hairloss was not a worry then, all I thought about was spending time with family/friends/etc. For 25 years, hairloss was never my worries..and i regret that i wore a hat everyday and not cleaned my scalp right. Fungus killed my haiir, and there are no signs of regrowth.
Just yesterday I would take walks on the beach, talk to girls, party, go out, etc..now i refuse to go to places where I cant where a hat..when a friend calls me on a friday night..i decide to stay inside and save myself the embarassment and pain. I am not the same person as I was yesterday.
God took my hair from me overnight, and continues to take it away from me..untill i become completely bald. I cannot imagine what tommorow brings..I just dont want to know. I feel for all you guys, I know how it feels although my hairloss was mostly fungal, but in the end, we are all dealing with the same thing. DHT kills hair follicles, Im just unfortunate that it came alive after the fungal infection and stress. They say that stress and depression progresses the MPB in an advanced form. Perhaps the gene was sleeping these past 25 years, but it came alive yesterday, and killed my hair.
Hopefully one day, we all can stand tall and enjoy life again, breath excitement, joy, and learn how to live and laugh and enjoy life. But its sad to say, there probably wont be a cure in our lifetime. Sometimes i just want to die, and hope that maybe in the next life I can start over again and relive my youth. Untill then, im just a broken man who had to go through something that very few have ever gone through overnight.
Hell everyone.
Reading through these comments, my story seems to have been told many times. I know exactly how everyone feels. I’ll be 20 next month and my hairline has receded and my crown is already becoming quite thin. It kills me, I spend all day comparing myself to other people. Actors on t.v., people on the street, customers at work, almost always thinking “i’d give anything to have your hair”. I used to be significantly more confident and had no problem meeting people, but now I find it very difficult to become confident enough to talk to these people, especially girls. I definitely have good and bad days. My good days would be a few glances in the mirror to try and use my hair to cover up my thinning and my bad days I will be extremely depressed, i’ve even wished I wasn’t around anymore. As said many times on this board, I know i shouldn’t be worrying about it this much, and I do try not to, but its very difficult. It truly is a cancer of the spirit.
In today’s business and corporate environment; appearances are everything. Just take a look at the most succesful young CEO’s and VP’s around the world. A full head of hair is associated with vibrance, confidence and excuberance. “Handsome” or “Good Looking” is generally accepted to mean a person with a full head of hair – even the kids have been brainwashed into believing that beauty is about external appearances.
My 2c. No one can make you feel depressed or unhappy. It is the meaning that you associate with people’s words or actions that makes you unhappy. Be positive and understand that there is more to this life than external appearances. Find someone who truly sees the beauty inside and is content with it. There is hope.
Note: the cure is not far off (3yrs max)….watch this space!!
im 26 and i have no hope or motivation to continue this worthless life of an unsuccesful ugly horseshoe bald loser that i have become.
I have no friends no work and im soon about to lose my apartment.
ive been alone and somewhat depressed many times throughout my life always doing my best to think positive and trying to get on with life. some guys looks ok with a shaved head, but most does not. male pattern baldness is extremely ugly for my personal appearance and im sure my days with girls is over by now.
i cant escape the fact that i will still have the horseshoe bald head for the rest of this unworthy life. there is nothing to do about it
there is no reason for me to get out of bed in the mornings except for using the toilet or eat. The only future i can see is a lifelong misery and unsatisfaction.
who look foward to a lonely humiliating life of working at some shit job and the only female contact possible would be payed hookers that can accept touching a ugly unattractive bald guy if he pays good.
lets admit it, there is thousands of before / after pictures on the internet of people who went through years of struggles with hormone pills and even transplant surgery and i have not until this date seen one , not even one that looks any good , they all look shit and ugly both before and after.
i have felt like this for about 1 year now and every day i look myself in the mirror i feel worse. the only end to the misery i can see is to pull the plug for good
It is somewhat hard to believe there is no cure yet, with all the technology available today. I tend to believe the big pharmaceutical conglomerates will smother any scientific progress in this field. They’re making way too much money from the palliatives (finasteride and minoxidil, for instance).
Can you imagine curing baldness with a single stroke? There’s too much profit to be lost.
I’ve just shaved mine off with a razor and started making the rest of my body as good as it can be. You don’t always look at the mantle piece when your poking the fire. The next time someone says hey baldy I’ll whip out a six pack and say eat me
its ruined my life… i avoid so many social occasions… anything formal i cant wear a hat to, i dont attend becuase im so ashamed of how ugly i look balding. I used to be pretty atrative, i mean i wasnt a model but i looked good enough that i felt confedent in my own skin…i have no confedence now, just self hate and shame. im only 26. I wouldnt mind if i was in my mid to late 30s when more men are dealing with hair loss, but not many guys in the 20s do. Most guys my age have full think hair and confedence and social lives that i wont let my self have becuase i can only imagine how other ppl feel about a bald guy in their 20s. i feel like a freak.
Why? I’m 20 yrs old and my hair won’t grow anymore. This started when I was 18. I’m so depressed. My beautiful girlfriend is bound to leave me. I take ecstasy to ease my pain. All I want is my hair back. I wouldn’t need anything if I had that back
hey there
well, i also feel like we are all going through the same process. most around here seem to be in their 20s and have freakin MPB. same for me, it started at the age of 20, now im 28 and the top of my head is shining through what little hair is left. it looks awful.
like so many around here i was REALLY sucesfull with girls beforehand. i just got what i wanted and i was very confident with my looks. i feld a bit like i was the center of the universe (it’s true im not making that up).
one day i just “felt” that my hair (which was thick and curly until then) was loosing “power”. NOTHING was visible in the mirror, but i knew: FUCK, your hair just lost its power!! it’s true. i knew it would go down pretty quickly 2 years before it got visible. Did anyone of you have the same experience? what i read here is that most of you see bald spots here and there. i FELT my hairgrowth weakening…so i cut my hair pretty short ( i had long hair before)
my life went down form that day on. i lost my girlfriend ( i really loved her and it took me 2 years to get together with her). i lost my self-confidence (and i was surprised myself how fast it is possible to loose so much confidence). you can built up self confidence over a very long time and still loose it overnight…it’s incredible. it was so unexpected. i was really shocked at traumatized that it could go down so quickly!
now 10 years later im still shocked how my live could take such an unwanted, unexpected turn. i was popoular and always in the middle of things.
i think the problem with hairloss, that we are all facing, is that so many things come together in such a short time that it really overwhelms you. the younger you are the harder it is to cope with baldness. in an age, when in fact you want to really get your life going the right way in every aspect, nature decides that you’re out of the race.
oh man…i could write tons of stuff in here but im afraid i’ve got a confusing way of writing. to come to an end:
now im 28 and i am still quite pissed off about my ever deteriorating looks. but i feel that i could get over it some day (which is already a good sign). all my friends have normal hair. they drag new girlfriends around everytime i see them and they all seem to be quite happy with their way of living. i didnt have a girlfriend in 10 years now! imagine how stupid i feel about that fact.
peace out!
Richard, so relieved to read your comment, nice to see that not everybody’s a total p***y, i understand it sucks and everybody who suffers from hairloss would rather not but whatever, it’s not that bad,
Sorry, posted that too early, didn’t mean to seem too harsh, i understand what it’s like, i started thinning when i was 18, didn’t think it was possible for it to happen that early, people were saying it to me , didn’t really start to freak until i was about 21, freaked out, my life is over, can’t ever do anything ever again etc etc, so after a healthy dose of blaming my parents, evern though my dad has a full head of hair, I eventually shaved my head, the year after i shaved my head, i had the best social year of my life , not because i look better bald, although i do happen to think i rock it pretty well
but because I acted like it didn’t bother me, i brought it up, i poked fun at it, you completely disarm everyone else by doing this, you’re going to hide yourselves away and act like hermits and blame the reason that nobody likes you on your hairloss, i can’t even see any of you and already i know i wouldn’t want to know you, stop feeling sorry for yourselves, some women may not like bald guys, true, but a lot are ok with it, but i gurantee you this, no women like crying little bitches who think that they are being punished by god, Like Richard said “Man up”, there are nearly 2 billion bald people on earth, also I have also dated a bald women, it was great, still the best sex ive ever had, she used to wear a wig but i alway’s prefered when she took it off during 
yo david dont kill your self man theres so much beauty left in life . sometimes u gotta say fuck everyone who is a dick . you gotta be better than them. their so many people dieing in this world who would love to just live a couple years more in a body of a ugly ass dog for gods sake, well u get my point. live life for wat it is beauty. and embrace who u are , what would the world be without unique individuals. i dont know u man but i love you in the way that i love the ocean and the trees and the flowers in the world u make up part of the world man, i thank u for that